Wednesday, September 11, 2013

a thought to ponder

i was sitting in a corner at a party not too long ago. i was very content observing everyone around me, sipping my tea and listening to countless people talk to one another about "what they do." now if you have been around me in the past few years you know that im not generally at large functions such as this. though i enjoyed large social gatherings in my younger years (im sounding like a very old 29 year old aren't i?) i now opt to spend a weekend evening wrapped up on my couch in my favorite down comforter, sipping a hot cocoa and watching my favorite old movie. needless to say despite my best efforts to get out of it, i was here at a big social gathering on a weekend night dreaming of that lovely spot on my couch. as i sat waiting for time to pass so i could slip out without anyone noticing, i started to become anxious. i realized sooner or later one of these nice people will come over to me and politely introduce themselves followed by a question. a very simple yet very scary question. sure enough just as i was going over what my answer would be, it happens. "why hello there! i am ___________. i am a friend of the host. and you are?" i kindly responded of course. "hello. my name is tisha. i am also a friend of the host." here it was. not even thirty seconds into our conversation, she asked the question. "so, what do you do?" i froze. just as i was about to mumble out what was certain to be gibberish, our lovely host came and stole me away to show me her beautiful home. whew crisis averted i thought! i politely said "goodbye" and hurried away.

on my way home from the party i pondered the situation. it should have been such an easy question to answer. why did i become so anxious? i felt so silly! there has been so much value placed on the answer to this question though that it became overwhelmingly daunting to me. i started to think how we rank others on the "social scale of life" by the answers to this question. we can find out from their answer if they are wealthy, important, educated, and so on. so i guess this means our answer really does defines us. but does it? well let's see i thought. i knew i had to ask myself the dreaded question. "what do I do?" well, i have had multiple jobs in my life so far. some very successful, some not so successful and most relatively short lived. i have had people comment (not kind comments i assure you) on this so surely i shouldn't start out with my long list of jobs. ok. well if my job does not define me then lets move on to education. ok, i graduated high school, took one semester in psychology at a community college and quickly realized that was not for me. i am now enrolled (at 29 mind you) at UCLA Extension for Early Childhood Education courses which will allow me to teach preschool but does not earn me a degree so, i should probably skip the education part too. so what's next? i'm not wealthy, no great awards to speak of, no monuments in my name, not even a new car or a great recent European vacation to speak of as i heard others discussing at the party. so what does this leave me? this leaves me what is most important and what most certainly defines me. it may not put me at the top of the social rank of life but i don't care. all of the sudden i wanted to rewind and go back to the party. i wanted to find that nice woman and continue our conversation. for the first time i wanted to be asked the now exciting question..."what do you do?"

"my name is tisha sanchez, nice to meet you. i am a child of God, i am a wife, i am a mother, i am a daughter, i am a friend."

that's it. nothing i ever "DO" will compare to those things. as a society we have forgotten what is important. thankfully i have come to realize this before it's too late. i can now live my life free and not afraid of what others may think of me but confident in who i am and who He created me to be. who knows, one day i may be wealthy or have a great career to speak of but it won't ever be what defines me. 

i wondered if i should even write this today but i felt someone needed to hear it. to some it wont mean much but rather something to read while passing the time waiting for a dinner date. for some it will be a joke just as everything else is. to some it may be something new to criticize since they are already tired of the last thing they were criticizing but to some, like me, it will be an awakening to the important things and people in life.

so, you know i have to ask..."what do you do?"